Remember

Remember when we were young
they taught us how
to talk
to write
to walk

We never realized that
they also taught us how
to live
to breathe
to exist

and that any deviation would
never be forgiven...

Let's pretend

Let’s pretend you’re here

Let’s pretend for just a while

I’d pretend you never left

And you can act like you still care.

You can imagine me to be all you ever wanted

You are already everything I want

I’d hold you tight,

Maybe you could hold me too.

We could lie down together

We could pretend to see a million stars in the sky

I’d cook for you,

You could pretend to like it too

I’d do anything for you

Maybe you could say you would too

It doesn’t have to be true, just say you do.

Tell me you still love me

I’ll tell you it’s not true

You could pretend to be annoyed

And then I’d hug you

But for now I’ll just bury my dreams

Pretend that you buried yours too.

Let go

What part of us was truly real?
Or were we just living a lie?
With false pretense did we seal
our fate or would we just deny?
Was everything about us fake?
Who is to tell what is right,
What it is that we can't take
Was it ever worth the fight?
The sun sets even in paradise,
So tonight we'll say our last goodbye
Who's to say that the sun will never rise
But this broken heart shall no longer cry.
No longer cry for who we were
For maybe none of it was ever real.

I give up.....on life, on love.....everything

I wish I could warn the world about it. Tell them how disastrous it really is. I see happy faces around and wonder why it can't be me. Big sins I must have committed to be punished this way. Who is to say what is right and what is not? You make one last sacrifice just to hope that if not you, at least he will be set free. This pain is my own and I'll deal with it. The truth about things one shall never know. I'll die with it alone.This shall be my one good deed.
Write it down God for someday I shall come redeem it. You took away so much. One day I shall live too. Even if I have to wait a lifetime....

But then what is the point of living if every moment is as painful as this. Is it not better to die?

Written in an instant!

I don't want this dream to end
don't want to wake up,
don't want to pretend
but alas I have my life to mend.

I wish I could just run away,
with no one to lead me astray.
Oh, how I would love to run,
and run I will once this is done.

With you

It felt like a million stars had burst

That they’d fallen just for me and you

For every wish I’d made had come true.

It felt like the first rain of the season

That it’d poured because we’d asked it to

That the very earth I stood on belonged to you.

For the first time in all my years

That you’d catch every silly tear

That made its way to the surface.

With you I feel like a queen

Who finally found her kingdom

A kingdom which you found for me

Where I can finally be free

A kingdom which belongs to me

Just like

I belong to you

Doesn't Hurt!

Imagery

I told you the words won't rhyme,
The birds won't sing, the bells won't chime.
The beauty you held, the truth you'd deny,
The way you'd believe every single lie.
And now you're world is crashing down,
smashed, broken and falling around.
I can't see tears flowing out,
Still in shock, are you in doubt?
Did you not believe me when I said,
That it's over now, it's time we fled.

Go away, it's over now!
Go. Find a way out somehow.

~Fin~

Its time I said goodbye,
Left words unsaid for far too long.
There is little left to do,
Little I can say to put it right.
I've let you down everytime,
I see the look in your eyes.
Yes, I saw you cry,
Heard you deny.
It's not your fault, it's all mine.
So I'm running away,
Not for you to find.
Maybe you'll forgive me someday,
For running, for leaving this way.

"Everything that comes together will fall apart someday!"

I may be vain, but I do not want to die without making sure that a considerable population has read everything that I have to say. I want to be famous enough for people to want to know how I became the person that I did....and I want them to read this blog. It may not be great, but it is part of who I am. I will be miserable if the blog died with me! That just wouldn't do..

Its time!

Its been 3 weeks now,
the sand is soaked by tears unleashed by the heavens,
it took it all and its been far too kind,
the mercy has been tested now.

you cried too long, you cried too much
now the battle rages inside of me
too long I fought this war for you,
its time you fight for me too!

Why me?

Oh prettyness!
You smiled at me,
What was it that you did see?
Was it the broken heart,
or the loss of hope
that gave you such glee?

Tell me that you smiled at me,
not because it was mercy
but because you truly felt,
understood,
what you did to me.

Tell me that it couldn't be.
It was just a dream I dared to see.
That you are not so kind,
but a cruel minion of the devil
that everyone knows you to be.

Dimensions

This pretentious world leaves me cold, she said. Chills, freezes and breaks all hopes one could ever nurture. Its easy to get lost in the web. To believe the lies to be true, to confuse myth with reality and so easy to live the lie. Isn't it warmer to be burnt in the fire of the deception than to step out and take a walk in the rain.
She laughs a hollow laugh as she puts on her hallowed jewels.

I could get used to this, she smiled at the reflection in the mirror. An image that fought so hard to fit in and yet not get lost in the crowd.
"What is it like to laugh?" she asked.
But you just laughed, I questioned as I held up the trail of her gown.
Laugh? That's not a laugh. Its just a crackle that emerges every time you want to scream. You'll learn little one, you're still new. You'll learn very soon....

Let's forget he existed.

Why would you want me to say things I am trying so hard to hide from the rest of the world?

What I thought would be a new beginning turned out to be a disaster I can't wait to put an end to!

I won't find you. If we were meant to be, you will find me!

Maybe in another lifetime

I know this is not going to end the way I want it to. I know I have damaged things beyond repair. This life wasn’t meant to get things going my way..but maybe, in another lifetime.

Near Strangers!

It would be such a shame
to have lived, laughed and walked,
on the same grounds, both you and I,
to have crossed paths every single day
for so long, two years I'd say,
but to have never said a word
to have not known the other
to leave unacquainted
to have never known the person you were
and not know if I'd missed out on a friend.